The course gave me fresh perspectives on the science of well-being. I enjoyed the studies on how our brain works and on happiness. It helped me make another step towards a more satisfying and happy life. I’m more than happy to share my knowledge and discoveries with my clients in my training programmes, but also in supervision, coaching and mentoring if necessary.
It was in 2006 when I discovered the famous Steve Jobs’ Stanford commencement addressthat had a huge impact on my life. Back then I didn’t know that Steve wasn’t the kind of leader I believe great leaders should be, but he sure had courage to follow his heart and intuition. Some of my favourite quotes from the speech:
‘Death is very likely the single best invention of Life. It is Life’s change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new. Right now the new is you, but someday not too long from now, you will gradually become the old and be cleared away. Sorry to be so dramatic, but it is quite true. Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become.’
‘You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backward. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future.’
Inspired by the commencement address and a Harvard University programme I attended years ago, together with Kairi Kuuskor from Bold Tuesday we delivered a practical seminar at Estonian Art Academy. The seminar was called ‘Courage to create one’s future’ and focused on two topics:
connecting the dots and trusting one heart and intuition in creating one’s future;
accelerators and brakes (or our dreams and fears, loyalties etc) and ways of releasing the latter;
growth support opportunities, such as mentoring, coaching and supervision.
We shared our own personal dots and pivots from the past and invited the big hall of students and lecturers to do so.
I discovered the Japanese concept Ma thanks to Peter Hawkins, Professor of Leadership at Henley Business School.
In Japanese Ma can be translated as “gap”, “space”, “pause”. In traditional Japanese arts and culture, ma refers to the artistic interpretation of an empty space and is often as important as the rest of an artwork. MA is in the purposeful pauses in a speech which make words stand out. Ma is in the silence between the notes which make the music.
Coaching and supervision enable to slow down, take a break from our everyday work and reflect. If we don’t take regular breaks, we may lose our essence.
Examples of ma appear in this old poem:
Thirty spokes meet in the hub,
though the space between them is the essence of the wheel;
Pots are formed from clay, though the space inside them is the essence of the pot;
Walls with windows and doors form the house,
though the space within them is the essence of the house.
Ott Tänak (born 1987), World Rally Champion 2019, shares his story in ‘Ott Tänak: the Movie’. Among other things the movie made me think about mindset and the quality of being coachable. Sometimes our mindset cannot develop as fast as our technical skills, especially if we don’t have a growth mindset. A person with I-know-it-all (instead of I-want-to-know-it-all) mindset may not be coachable. However, even the most successful champions, executives … actually anyone can benefit from coaching and supervision, but that requires a growth mindset and some humility.
In the movie, Ott Tänak shares how his mindset cost him his career at one point in his life:
‘My development was fast, but in my head … I couldn’t mentally develop that fast. I was the same boy who I had been in 2010, but in 2012 I was racing with world-class rally drivers, yet I wasn’t ready for that. Finally, the mistakes were very simple, but cost a lot and eventually cost me my career at that time.’
Another thing that the movie made me think about is the beauty of fragility and vulnerability. Sometimes our hearts are broken. It takes courage to be fragile and vulnerable and it hurts. Yet, it also connects people. ‘When I see how much pain I actually cause to my loved ones, this is the only breaking point for me,’ said Ott Tänak. And pain helps us grow. We grow as parents, children, colleagues and friends … as human beings.
Positiivse psühholoogia kursus säilenõtkuse oskustest pakkus mõtteainet ning ideid, mida endas inimesena arendada. Näiteks sain ma teadlikumaks, et mõnikord võin ma olla tõeline rõõmutapja või rõõmu kaaperdaja, teinekord jälle rõõmu võimendaja. Ma pigem eelistaksin olla rõõmu võimendaja, sest ma usun, et seeläbi toetame enda ja teiste kasvamist enam kui rõõmu tapmise või kaaperdamise läbi.
Ilmselt kandub säilenõtkuse teema edaspidi veelgi rohkem ka minu coachinguprotsessidesse ja koolitustesse, et innustada inimesi veelgi enam ennast ja teisi väärtustama ning seeläbi kasvama oma maksimaalse potentsiaali suunas.
november 15th, 2018 Posted by KaidiCoaching
0 thoughts on “Meeskonna coaching Soomes”
Seekordne meeskonna coaching viis mind taas Soome. Lisaks rahvusvahelise korporatsiooni põnevatele tööalastele teemadele jäi aega ka töövälisteks juttudeks. Seekord küsisin kahelt kogenud emalt ühe soovituse, kuidas lapsi kasvatada. Minu meelest on neid hea kõigil meeles pidada, seetõttu jagan ka siin.
Kahe poisi ema poegade kasvatamise kohta:
‘Ära ise ole täiuslik. Kui su standardid on liiga kõrged, võib poeg tunda, et ta ei ulatu nendeni ning see võib tekitada stressi ja pessimismi.’
Kahe tüdruku ema tüdrukute kasvatamise kohta:
‘Kuula. Mitte nii, et lepite omavahel suhtlemiseks eraldi aja kokku, aga kuula teda hoolega ka igapäevaste tegevuste kõrval. Lihtsalt kuula.’
Minu meelest on need mõlemad head nõuanded ka juhtidele ja meeskondadele. Ärge püüdke olla täiuslikud ning kuulake üksteist.